• Name: *|MMERGE5|*
• Candybar: *|MMERGE6|*
• Score: *|MMERGE9|* (leader is at *|MMERGE11|*)
• How many chimps are at or above your score: *|MMERGE8|*
• Rank: *|MMERGE10|*/858
• Your Bracket: Click here

Wouldn't It Be Better if No Underdogs Ever Won?

Greetings from lovely Porto, Portugal. Wendy and I went to the World of Wine World of Cork (WoWWoC) Museum today, and I paid 1 Euro to make this custom JQMCBP cork. Portugal produces half of the world's cork, but until today it had no footprint with the JQMCBP. No longer. Winner will get this as a throw-in extra for their candy. Which brings me to...

...this is only the second time in tournament history when all four #1 seeds won their regions and advanced to the Final Four. As a result, because lots of Candy Seekers lean hard on the favorites (it's a strategy; I mean, it's not MY strategy, the best strategy, which will be validated one of these years, but...it's a strategy), there is a logjam at the top of the table. We have FIVE tied for the lead right now.

Here's something interesting: of the five tied for the JQMCBP lead, 2 are dogs. Well, I'm sure one of them is a dog. Actually I'm sure one of them is two dogs. Or rather, I'd be disturbed if one of them weren't two dogs and also concerned if one of them is a dog. Let me explain.

Maya & Gypsy, or rather Gypsy & Maya chose Merrick Fresh Kisses for Lg Dogs as their candy. You can see my concern if Maya & Gypsy, I'm sorry Gypsy & Maya, were not in fact dogs.

Meanwhile, Bluehowler, which very much sounds like a dog, has selected Plain M&M's. I am not a dog owner, but I've heard this is not something you give dogs. Maybe not fatal, but perhaps so to your rugs. Or so I have heard.

SO ANYWAY, rounding out the top 5 are Sharon "Butterfinger" Long, Patti "Reese's Peanut Butter Cup" Mott, and John "Reese's Peanut Butter Cup" Davidson.

Upsets...who picked 'em

Highlighting those brave souls that chose oddball longshots to win games

Whose champion bit it?

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, but it never sucks worse than when the team you picked to win it all loses it all. It's even worse when I publish it for all to read!

While all four #1 seeds have advanced to the Final Four, 176 of you lost your champion over the weekend. It was a real bad weekend for Michiganders.

So long suckers!

Boo Rah Rah

I asked you if your alma mater was in the tournament. Why? So I could make fun of you when they lose!

99 luftbaloons, floating in the summer sky. 99 candy seekers, losing their alma maters. Denk' an dich und lass' ihn fliegen.

Candy Bar of the Day

Where I give out fake awards for my favorite candy selections

The Straw That Stirs the Drink Award, goes to five hungry candy seekers that just can't give up on late 1970s Yankees baseball: Robert "Reggie!" Van Beek, Kendall "Reggie Bar" DiGirolomo, Eustace "Reggie Bar" Haney, Michael "REGGIE! bar" Ferreter, and Braden "Reggie Bar" Smalling. Reggie Bars, or rather REGGIE! bars, or shortened to just Reggie!, was a candybar first delivered as a giveaway to a Yankees game in 1978 to celebrate beloved (by New York) supervillain (to everyone else) Reggie Jackson. There have been a few REGGIE! selections every year for the past 28, JQMCBPs. First, I'm assuming from people that actually remembered the original, but now it's pretty clear that REGGIE! has cross-generational appeal.

I did, one year, have to buy a (probably extremely dessicated) Kirby Puckett bar off of eBay to settle up with a JQMCBP winner, but I've never had to procure a REGGIE!. I was concerned that if one of these folks would ever win, they'd be faced with the reality that they were going to get something in the mail once deemed edible by the FDA*, but now almost as old as The Candymeister, which is to say...OLD. But nope, REGGIE! is back, baby! On reggiejackson.com, I am not making this up, you can buy fresh ones (minimum one case). 24 will set you back $70, while 24 in a Reggie Jackson signed box will set you back a low low $250. Quite a deal (Smalling, you need to get on this). Here is the whole story behind it's reboot.

* I suppose also still deemed edible by the FDA because all food inspections have been suspended because food inspections are "woke".

Losing Mascots: Let's Talk About Them!

Pointless Discussion about Losing Teams and Their Mascots

Testudo, the University of Maryland Terrapin Dead Behind the Eyes: 0 Looks Like the Thing It's Trying To Be: 9 Terrifying to Meet: 1 Possible salmonella carrier: 10 It's pretty hard to deny how great a terrapin is as a mascot. Solid work here Maryland, I think you've done the state proud, even if everyone there would rather have a blue crab covered in Old Bay.

And that brings us back (again) to the Texas Tech Red Raider. In 2019, I had the opportunity to visit Final Four Practice Day sponsored by Reese's (I am not making this up, a candybar company sponsored a Final Four event; could not have drawn that up better). The Texas Tech Red Raider was present, and he still haunts my dreams. DEAD BEHIND THE EYES: 1,000,000.

Here again is my photo of this abomination from 2019

enhance

enhance!

ENHANCE!

Enough with the crap, who's ahead?

Top 10 Humans

Top 10 Chimps

cheers,
the Meister

Linky links:

• The Leaderboard for checking out who is ahead
• What's Your J? will tell you how risky your picks were
• SSS Want to see who picked brackets similar to yours? You do??? srsly why.
• Prognosticationland for looking at some brackets
• Hall of Shame will tell you who is out of the race for candy completely